JESUS! I can't believe I wrote my entry last night and forgot to mention somethings that are going on!

First, on Wednesday night, my Aunt had her baby. So I have a new baby cousin. This is number 3 for her, and number 4 for my uncle. So maybe they are gonna slow it down! HA! She had a baby girl and the girl's name is..umm...just one sec...well hell, I totally forget! I'll update when I do know and I have a pic. So I would just like to congradulate them on thier new addition to our huge family!

Next, is something that I can NOT believe I left out. I am sure that all of you remember my ex-best friend Amber right? Well, for those who don't, please click HERE for more on that.

Well, anyway, so Wednesday night after a very satisfying trip to Wal-mart, I was just rushing to do my clean up and the phone rings at like 11:00 PM. First of all, I do not get many calls and I never get calls that late at night unless something is wrong. So, I couldn't find the phone, and when I finally did, I picked up without looking at the Caller I.D. When I answered, I was shocked to hear Amber's voice on the other end!

She sounded like she had been crying. So, I figured something had happened. Here is about how the conversation went...

ME: Hello
Amber: Hey girl!
Me: YES, OMG, is this Amber?
Amber: Yea! How the hell are you? --sounding as if she was crying.
Me: I'm fine, are you okay? Are you crying? What is wrong?
Amber: Yea, I'm fine, just dealing with shit right now. So what is going on with you?
Me: Well, nothing important. Just moved into a house on base, Tommy's in Vegas, and I do about nothing. Same old ya know?
Amber: That's good. So nothing really going on?
ME: No, but what is going on with you?
Amber: Well, I just got to thinking, and I miss you a lot. And something happened about a month ago that I want to explain to you. And hopefully you can forgive me for how things were between us when you left Tennessee this summer.
ME: Okay, I'll listen, but just so you know I was really fucking hurt when I left.
Amber: I know, please just let me explain.
First, Mike and I moved out of his Mom's house into our own apartment. (Mike is her boyfriend). So about a month ago, I brought home a friend from work, he starts bitching and shit that he wanted to be alone with me that night. I got pissed because we were always alone, and all we ever did was sit and watch fucking T.V. I wanted to have some fun ya know?
ME: UH huh.
Amber: So, he got mad, and my friend left. He later told me that he didn't want me hanging out with her anymore. And I got mad because I was tired of him always telling me who to fucking hang out with. So, to make a long story short, the subject of you (me) came up. He told me that over the summer he would delete your messages and your calls. He would tell me that you called and said that you were busy or going out with someone else and couldn't make it out with me. He was trying to keep me from you. He was jealous I guess of our friendship, and he didn't want me to be your friend anymore so he would lie to me. --Amber starting to cry more-- And I want you to know that I am so so sorry. If I had known, I would have never blew you off like that. I thought that you were blowing me off. I hope you understand and can forgive me.
ME: Well, you must understand that I was really upset at that time. I couldn't understand after all I had done for you that you would treat me that way. And still, it felt like you were choosing him over me. I mean, I'm a forgive and forget kinda gal, so I'll forgive ya, but I'm gonna watch my back and you have to understand that.
Amber: I know and I understand. But I hope you know that I am so sorry.
Me: I do, I understand. So are you still with Mike?
Amber: NO NO! I kicked him outta the house. He was too possesive and too clingy. And the fact that he did that just was the icing on the cake. I just wanted to be free of him. He moved out about a month ago.
ME: Well, that is good. Because I honestly thought he was a big baby, and was too possesive too.

The conversation continued with us just talking about really nothing. Then I had to go because I needed to get my cleaning done. It was good to talk to her, but it was different. I mean, I appreciate her apology, but part me thinks that I am better off with out her. I don't know, it's not like I'm gonna see her again for a while, so we'll just see.

On another bad note, Tommy called me this morning. I knew something was up because he usually doesn't call me that time of day, he's usually asleep.

The first thing outta his mouth is that he's not gonna hang out with my friend Sandi anymore. He says that she over reacted to a conversation that him and her and a few others were having last night in the hot tub. This pisses me off. Sandi is MY friend, and he goes down there and starts hanging out with her and then something happens that HE doesnt' like, and now I'm not supposed to be friends with her either. Honestly from what I heard, I think BOTH people over reacted. I think Tommy was over reacting by telling me he doesn't want me to be her friend anymore, and I think that maybe she over reacted during thier conversation about racism. WHY DO PEOPLE TALK ABOUT RACISM? It always leads to some sort of disagreement. It's so fucking stupid.

Anyway, I think the whole thing was immature on all the people invovled parts, and personally I don't have a side nor do I care. But if Sandi ever speaks to me again, I'll be in a bad situation. I don't know what to do. Tommy doesn't want me to be friend with her anymore because he thinks she's a psycho bitch, (for the record I don't think so), but on the other hand, Tommy probably upset her so badly that she will NOT want to see me anymore. Who fucking knows.

But towards the end of my conversation with Tommy, I realized something.

I recently made a new friend, and it was through Sandi. Over the weekend I was babysitting Sandi's baby while her husband drove to Vegas to see her. On Saturday when I took Kailee to Sesame Street Live, Sandi's baby went to his other sitter, Carly. When I picked up the baby, I ened up staying at Carly's house because she was really freaking cool. She invited me to a Romance Party on Tuesday night, and I went to that. I had a blast. Some of the most fun I've had in quite a while.

Here is the problem. Carly's husband works with Sandi. So I just hope that Sandi doesn't go and tell him what happened in Vegas with my husband. When I expressed my concern about this, Tommy's reaction was that he hoped too it didn't make Carly not like me because we could use her for a babysitter. Well, I never planned on asking Carly all that much to babysit because she already has two kids. And when I told Tommy that, he then said that he didn't care what they thought then. OMG that pisses me off!

Before, I had a total of FOUR friends here. FOUR that is it. One is really just an aqqaintance, and that is Kailee's sitter. The other three are:
Ava, Sandi, and Carly. And now that Sandi and Tommy don't like each other, I probably don't have her for a friend anymore, and that will probably lead to Carly not liking me anymore. And that leaves me back to having only ONE fucking friend. That bothers me so! What am I going to do. See Tommy says shit and acts without thinking of how something will affect my feelings. Him telling me not to be friends with someone just shows me that he doesn't much care for my feelings. I am so fucking tired of this shit!

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