I decided that yesterday�s entry was shit. I wanted to write more but just didn�t have the time or thoughts and I hadn�t a clue what to say. The truth is that I feel better about being back here, but I really don�t. The second I start to cheer up, something reminds me of home, my Mom, my family, everything there and then I get upset again. I�m so sick of feeling this way. My husband seems so fine after leaving. How does he do it? I guess in Boot Camp they fucking desensitize him and make him have no feelings about anything but the fucking Military. Yea, that has to be it. But anyway, not only am I tired of feeling this way, I�m tired of complaining and whining about it. I�m sure one of you reading my journal is thinking �damn what a whiney baby.� So, this is it, no more whining, no more complaining. I have to make the best of the situation as I have been for almost two years now. I will involve myself in however many things it takes to make myself feel better. I mean shit, my house is practically spotless and that never happens! I must really be upset if I�m cleaning this much! HA!

My cookout thing actually went well. Everyone actually came, which was a shocker to me. Randi and Kailee swam in the kiddie pool. Then we ate dinner, which everyone said was really good. That made me feel good. We actually sat outside too! I loved that. I have this really nice backyard, a nice patio table, and before we never used it. So that was really cool. Then afterwards Randi and I drank some drinks and decided we would fill up the kiddie pool with boiling hot water to warm it up. This took forever, and it wasn�t really that warm in the end. But nonetheless we still layed in it under the stars which was really relaxing. Then everyone went home and that was the end.

So, I guess there isn�t anything else to say, but I wanted to do this little survey thing, I stole it from Treessa. I love these survey things. It�s a sad thing about me, but I am a nerd, so oh well. Hope you enjoy and have a great start to the week everyone!

Four vacations you have taken:
1. Fort Lauderdale, Florida
2. Daytona Beach, Florida
3. Virginia Beach, Virginia
4. St. Louis, Missouri

Four songs you get stuck in your head frequently:
1. �Broken Down� � Bombshell Crush
2. Dora the Explorer Theme Song
3. Kim Possible Theme Song
4. �Time after Time� � Cindy Lauper or Bombshell Crush

Four things you'd like to learn:
1. How to manage money better
2. How to play the Guitar and the Bass
3. Patience
4. How to keep my carpets clean

Four beverages you drink frequently:
1. Tea
2. Coffee
3. Dr. Pepper
4. Alcohol

Four tv shows that were on when you were a kid:
1. Three�s Company
2. Full House
3. The Cosby Show
4. Roseanne
How about everything they show on Nick @ Nite!!

Four places to go in your area: This question will be answered about Tennessee because it�s really �my� area, Idaho is NOT and I know nothing about Idaho really
1. Downtown Riverfront Park � Nashville Tennessee
2. Gatlinburg � It�s great there
3. Six Flags Kentucky Kingdom
4. Grand Ole� Opry and Opryland Resort

Four things to do when you're bored:
1. Make Greeting Cards
2. Internet
3. Play Pogo Games
4. Scrapbook

Four things that never fail to cheer you up:
1. Kailee Elizabeth
2. My Mom
3. A Cigarette (I know how sad)
4. Packages from Home

About 20 years ago...
1. I was three years old
2. Ronald Regan was president
3. I had just gone to live with my Grandparents
4. I had my very own horse named Rodney

About 10 years ago...
1. I was 13 years old
2. I lived with my Dad and Stepmom
3. I had two sisters Jessica and Jennifer
4. Bill Clinton was President

About 5 years ago...
1. I was 18 and graduated high school
2. I had just gotten pregnant with Kailee
3. I participated in my first election which was the infamous Gore vs. Bush election of 2000
4. I thought I knew everything, and boy was I wrong

About 2 years ago...
1. I had just turned 21 and just gotten married
2. My husband left for the Air Force
3. I still lived in Tennessee
4. I was a bartender for Ruby Tuesdays

About 1 year ago...
1. I had just flew back to Tennessee to spend the summer
2. My husband was supposed to go to Korea on deployment but was cut off of it at the last minute
3. The husband and I didn�t get along well while I was gone
4. But I was having a blast in Tennessee anyway!

Today...
1. I slept too late
2. I talked on the phone for an hour
3. I checked my email
4. I have to go register Kailee for preschool/Headstart.

Four things that scare you:
1. SPIDERS!
2. Ventrilliquist
3. Snakes
4. Something happening to someone I care for, or my daughter, or one of them dying

Seven things that make you laugh:
1. Kailee � so very much
2. Pot
3. My Mom�s Fiancee
4. My Husband
5. The TV show Family Guy
6. The TV show Friends
7. Adam Sandler

Seven things you love:
1. Kailee
2. My Mom
3. My Entire Family
4. Mary Kay products
5. Thunderstorms
6. MY MUSIC
7. Tennessee

Seven things you hate:
1. IDAHO
2. Snow
3. Idaho
4. that movie �Team America�
5. Computers
6. Did I mention Idaho?
7. My hair when it frizzes up

Seven things you don't understand:
1. My Husband
2. Calculus
3. Why I decided to do in home childcare
4. My Mom�s Job
5. How people can kill other people
6. The republican party
7. Why the hell the Military sent us to Idaho

Seven things on your desk:
1. Picture of Kailee and my Mom
2. A card my Grandmother made for me
3. A lamp
4. A picture of all three of my sisters
5. Post-it Notes
6. A Bobble Head
7. Speakers

Right now you are:
1. Typing this survey for my entry
2. Eating a bowl of cereal for breakfast which is a late breakfast
3. Listening to Bombshell Crush
4. Telling my daughter she can�t go swim until the water gets warmer
5. About to take a shower and go register Kailee for preschool
6. Scratching my neck and it�s horrible rash, I swear I�m allergic to something
7. Thinking about how to rearrange my office

Seven facts about you:
1. I have natural Red Hair
2. I make Greeting cards
3. I scrapbook
4. My Mom is my best friend
5. I sell Mary Kay cosmetics
6. I hate doing the Laundry
7. I love swimming

Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Raise my child and hopefully another child to be the best person they can be
2. Travel Europe
3. Travel Canada
4. Be a successful business woman, and make lots of money of course
5. Take care of myself financially instead of depend on someone else
6. Learn to play the guitar
7. Buy a T-shirt for my daughter from every US State (she�s got a lot already!)

Seven Famous People You Want To Meet:
1. Dave Matthews
2. Maynard James Keenan
3. President Clinton and his wife
4. Johnny Depp
5. Billy Corgan
6. The entire Cast of Friends
7. Catherine Zeta-Jones

Top 7 songs people should give a listen:
1. Noose � A Perfect Circle
2. Imagine � Paul McCartney
3. Remember When - Alan Jackson
4. 46 & 2 - Tool
5. Thirdeye - Tool
6. 1979 � Smashing Pumpkins
7. Lightening Crashes � Live

Top 7 things that turn you on about your sex of choice:
1. Eyes
2. Personality
3. Hands
4. Hair
5. Attitude
6. Smell
7. Chest

Top 7 things you say the most:
1. �NO KAILEE! STOP!�
2. I love you
3. Whatever
4. Fuck That
5. So What
6. Get over it
7. Uhhuhh

Well that�s all hope everyone has a great day and a great week!

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