So it says Wednesday but I've yet to go to bed yet, so it's still Tuesday. First let's talk about my weekend. Or did I do that already? Well, then let's talk about my Fourth of July.

It was okay. There are some issues with some certain people in our lives, whose names I will not mention at this time (yet again, I'm waiting on the fucking private entries to work, and the guy has yet to answer my emails or tech support questions) Once the private thing works, then I'll write about the past few weeks drama, and you can read the drama. For now, sorry but all I can say is there are some issues going on and these issues have me upset and fucking going insane.

Why is it, in all my life, whenever I stand up for myself, I always end up as the bad guy? I always end up as the bitch. The person that flew off the handle, and over reacted to everything? Why is that? I voice my opinion, and I'm the bad guy. I state my feelings, and I'm the bad guy. I get tired of hiding the way I feel, so I just simply say what I'm feeling, and I'm the bad guy. I'm a bitch who over reacted and went off the handle with a bad attitude as fucking always. Now, tell me, why does this happen. I thought this was the country of free speech? But apparently one person, such as myself, can't simply say to another person, "Hey you have pissed me off, or I don't like the way you treated me" without being made out to be the bad guy. So what I am I going to do. Shut the hell up. Whatever is all I gotta say. I'm sick of the shit. Sick of everyone around me making me be the bad fucking guy. Fuck them. Fuck. Them.

Now, this isn't what I wanted to talk about. Fuck that shit. Wednesday is my baby girl's birthday! Four years ago on July 6th, I was in my second day of labor, and she finally came into this world. My Kailee is turning four tomorrow, and I couldn't be sadder. Why does time have to fly by so fucking fast? One day our babies are in diapers and won't let you out of thier sight, the next day they are having full blown conversations with you and turning four! What happened to the last four years?

Here is Kailee age 1 in 2002:

Here is Kailee less than a month ago, these are her 4 year old pictures:

Wow! You can't really see her face all that well in the first picture, but you can tell she was bald. Yea, she didn't really have hair till she was 18 months. And then it was just a little bit of fine stuff. Now, she has a long head of really really really blonde hair. Blue eyes, perfect little body, skinny as can be, she tans instead of burns like her Mom and Dad (don't ask me where she gets that from!), and she has the attitude. I tell ya, when she grows up, we're gonna have trouble. That's all I'm saying.

So anyhow, I've got a small little party for her planned. Just us and some friends. She so into Lilo and Stitch right now, so I've ordered her a Lilo and Stitch cake, I've got a few party favors and decorations that are Hawiian like so we're gonna have a little party! I'll let her swim, and pretty much whatever else she wants to do. It's her birthday! God I love her too. My little baby.

Also this is her first Birthday away from home, and our family, especially her Nana (my Mom). This is gonna be so hard for my Mother I know. But there will be many more Birthdays so we will do fine I'm sure.

Well I gotta get to bed. That's about all for now. Have a good one everyone!

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