Yea, it's been a few since I've been on here. Reasons being.....

1. I'm tired A LOT. Another pregnancy effect that I know will pass in a week or so. But seriously, I sleep like 12 hours a day. It's not normal.

2. Last week I was in the ER. DEHYDRATED AGAIN. I don't understand it. I drink a lot of water. I'm pissing clear. I don't understand it at all. But I'm all better now. Hopefully. I have a doctor's appointment that will confirm that tomorrow. The baby's great, I'm just not.

3. I really haven't had much to write about. Who really wants to hear over and over how this pregnancy is making me feel like shit? Or how I spend most of my time laying in bed watching TLC? Or how the only thing I feel like doing with my existing child is reading her a book or watching her favorite TV show b/c if I attempt to do anything else, I'll pass out? It's all pathetic really, and I hate whining. I HATE WHINING! People that constantly complain get on my nerves. So why would I subject all you lovely readers to my whining. Instead, I just shut the fuck up.

On a good note. I'm 20 weeks pregnant. HALF WAY THROUGH IT! Maybe the rest will be quick! Like the last 2 years of high school. Man did that time fly.

On another good note.....We are going to see TOOL (our favorite band) in concert in 6 days. I'm so fucking excited. I can't contain myself. I just hope I have the energy. We're seeing them in Alberquerque, New Mexico next Tuesday. We are driving down that morning. It's only 5 hours away. I have a hotel reserved. And we are spending the night after the show. Then we'll drive back to The Springs that next morning. And that night, we have tickets to yet ANOTHER TOOL show right here at home. It's gonna be so awesome. I can't wait.

On a not so good note. I've been incredibly depressed lately. I think another lovely pregnancy effect. But, it's just getting to me. Like I said I hate whining, but I really need to get this out.

Last year, I was OBSESSED with moving here to Colorado. I could not wait. Not to mention the fact that I HATED Idaho the entire time we lived there. HATED IT. But, now, I miss the hell out of that place. I miss my house, my friends, my life there, everything. I don't get it. I've gotten everything I wanted. Seriously. I wanted to move here, got it. I wanted to get knocked up, got it. I wanted a second car, got it. I wanted a nice house off base, got it. Everything I've ever wanted for the last 3 years, I've gotten. So why am I so unhappy with life now? Why is it that the grass seems greener on the other side. Like I had life so good in Idaho, and am only seeing it now that I'm gone. I'll never have that life back. Ever. And I hate it. For some reason I can't understand why I was so unhappy there. I look back on it all, and I had it made. I had friends. Not many, but the few I had, were awesome. I had a freaking kick ass house to live in, and didn't have to pay a dime for it. And now that I've gotten what I (thought) wanted....I'm so unhappy, and it's just so fucking sad. AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGG! I need help. And I need to shut up.

Tomorrow I promise to return in a better mood. I'm sure all of this is pregnancy, or change, and I'll get over it and be happy soon. I'm sure that I'm mostly being a big huge baby and seriously need to evaluate how incredibly blessed and lucky I am in this life. So I have other shit to talk about, and I'll come back tomorrow in a lighter more peppy mood, and spill the gossip that I've been holding onto for a week now! For tonight, I bid you farewell, and thanks for reading.

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